LoOkIng for the MoSt FaTal PoIson?

Just recently--I met a student in one of my admission interviews--he seem okay and really neat--but as soon as I asked him about his plans for his future---his energy zapped mine! He complained about how his parents forced him to study--he complained about his life being poor and deprived, he told me he cannot imagine himself finishing a degree--blah--blah--blah...I instantly knew--HE IS INFECTED! Infected and must have ingested the most fatal poison of all! I saw in him as a prisoner without any control over his destination. I felt bad for him though....

Do you want to know what went wrong with that man? He is poisoned! Well, I'm not talking about the poison or that substance you can just smell, see, taste or touch---I know we are intelligent enough not to ingest even a drop of those fatal chemical substances...but do you know that the most lethal of all these poisons is none other than the insidious disease known as ‘negativitism’! Repeatedly, many people are continously poisoning their minds with negativity and though we cannot see this negativity, it is just as fatal. This kind of poison mutilates, cripples, and corrodes the human spirit and we need to stop it before it contaminates our lives.

How does negativity start? this poison starts with negative thoughts--the dark clouds brooding over our thoughts obscure our vision of our dreams and soon creates a little monster in us--making us more confrontational, apathetic, and cynical. Negative thinking cripples our life to one degree or another. It robs us of the opportunity to live up to our full potential and of achieving our greatest desires. Negative thoughts is a self-defeating warrior. Everything bad/negative we say about ourselves in our self-talks is always a self-suggestion. We are unwittingly and unconsciously practicing self-hypnosis, programing ourselves for failure, and creating self-fulfilling prophecies. Unconsciously---negative thoughts are slowly killing our dreams, our passion for life and the little happiness in our hearts.

So how do we fight this lethal poison?

If you find yourself thinking negative thoughts… …think again.
Strive to think positive, empowering and supportive thoughts. The negative world of our imagination creates a negative world that is real and pressing.

Just as you monitor your thoughts, monitor the words that you speak especially those spoken to yourself. Listen carefully to every word that is coming from your mouth and analyze if these words are swords to stop you from dreaming and from achieving genuine happiness.

Be passionate in your speech and express your enthusiasm with your words.
The energy of the words that you speak is a powerful force that is creative.

There is so much to be positive about! Look around you--smell the flowers and see the beauty within and outside.....

Fun with HCEC!

My weekend with the faculty and staff of Holy Child Educational Center was awesome! My two days with them was a proof that good teachers come in a variety of sizes, shapes, colors, gender and backgrounds. Some are old, some young, some serious and some funny (can't forget the few teachers that made the learning sessions truly fun!). More than being teachers, they showed me that first and foremost, they are simple beings with individual with hopes, dreams, strengths, and vulnerabilities, a great reminder of being truly human. My whole journey with them made me realize how these teachers love their job and their students--with high hopes, valid concerns, and great expectations for each of their pupils.These teachers were so dynamic that they're not afraid to try new things, to look a little silly (from time to time), to show little sadness, to be little angry, to get mighty excited and to act really happy. It was truly a fun weekend---not only because I met real good teachers with genuine personas but i gained valuable friends as well---thats the beauty of my work! Special thanks to Mr and Mrs Nadal and to Madam Helen for the warm accomodation!

Until our next meeting dear teachers!

LoVe 4 mY CoUnTrY

I love plane rides---not because of the adrenaline rush it gives me when it take off--but I love the waiting periods before the flight (love the 2 hours check-in period before the actual plane ride!). In these two hours--I get to live in silence---and I get to read books I long to read continously (the kind of books once you pop--you cant stop!). In my last travel---I became so excited that I forgot to put my fav book in my bag---imagine my desperation! Luckily, a kind soul in the airport (thanks to Gee!) lent me her book---PHILIPPINE HISTORY BOOK!

After reading half of the book---I started loving my country even more! Honestly--I love my country--but I hate the government! It's always good to love your country, after all, it's where I live--but lately---appreciating how the government runs the country makes me feel frustrated!

As I review the history of my country, I'm loving what great things people have done for the Philippines.. loving what happened in the country in the past--both the good times and the bad times. I love this country because it is where my ancestors were born and raised. They were proud of the land and took good care of it. On the contrary, I dont understand though why some people in the government continously abuses the country as they take advantage of its systems and the character strengths of its people. Such corrupt action goes against the goodwill that should be at the core of our patriotism. However, despite of all these little shortcomings, I still love this land. I was born here and will die here. I believe you need to stick up for your heritage and what your ancestors have done, my ancestors have made this country for me and I will keep it and defend it.

Please watch the new version of the Philippine National Anthem made by the famous director--mae paner of the ehemplo group. I hope this video will inspire all of us as we continue to try appreciating and healing our country.

My Kind of Music

Due to insistent public demand---i would like to share once again my choice of music--music for healing and personal growth. You can freely download these music in the net--itunes or whatever form---these are beautiful and deeply striking songs for us to enjoy! In these new collections of songs---we will find the power of sound to improve our quality of daily life.Music through these songs will takes us to memories of love, loss, joy or sorrow. When we accept music and give it a place in our hearts and minds, music becomes healing.

Try listening to these beautiful soulful music:

1. Let Love In Album-by Goo Goo Dolls

2. Stay by Gavin deGraw

3. Let It Go-Gavin de Graw

4. Search your soul-by Amungus

5. Imagine-by beatles/american idol

6. Songs of Jewel

7. Music is Hope Album (All Star Collection)

Music is a language which can communicate with anyone, anywhere, throughout the world...let music touch your life!

Literature on Death and Dying

Someone texted me today asking for literatures on death and dying. She is a long time friend whom I met in my numerous wellnes trainings---she probably know how much I am fascinated with the psychology of death. Here are some of my most fav books on death and dying. I hope people who are interested on dying will find these literature helpful.

1. ON DEATH AND DYING (by elizabeth kubler ross) This book is a classic which has helped millions of people to better deal with death and the dying process. In this remarkable book, Dr. Kubler-Ross first explored the now-famous five stages of dealing with impending death: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

2. THE PSYCHOLOGY OF DEATH ( by Robert Kastenbaum) This basic text includes chapters on how we understand death, the experience of death in childhood and adolescence with discussion on suicide, physician assisted death, death anxiety and many others.

3. THE PRIVATE WORLD OF DYING CHILDREN ( by Myra Bluebond-Langner) The author studied terminally ill children, spending time with them in hospital wards. She gains their trust and ultimately comes to see the world through these children’s eyes. She moves us to understand that children do not fear entirely for their own lives, but vigilantly stand proud in the face of death, subtly comforting their doctors through their smiles while at the same time watching their parents watch them die. A profound, moving book.

A friend of mine sent me this beautiful email that made me really reflect today. Each word captured my sentiments and i would really love to keep them in my heart!

BALANCE SHEET OF LIFE.

Our Birth is our Opening Balance!

Our Death is our Closing Balance!

Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities Our Creative Ideas are our Assets

Heart is our Current Asset

Soul is our Fixed Asset Brain is our Fixed Deposit

Thinking is our Current Account

Achievements are our Capital Character & Morals,

our Stock-in-Trade Friends are our General Reserves

Values & Behavior are our Goodwill

Patience is our Interest

Earned Love is our Dividend

Children are our Bonus Issues

Education is Brands / Patents Knowledge is our Investment

Experience is our Premium Account

The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.

The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award.

Some very Good and Very bad things ...

The most destructive habit....... .......... ......Worry

The greatest Joy......... .......... ......... ....Giving

The greatest loss.......Loss of self-respect

The most satisfying work........ ........Helping others

The ugliest personality trait....... .....Selfishness Error! Filename not specified.

The most endangered species..... ....Dedicated leaders

Our greatest natural resource.... ......... ...Our youth

The greatest 'shot in the arm'.........Encouragement

The greatest problem to overcome.... .......... ...Fear

The most effective sleeping pill....... Peace of mind

The most crippling failure disease...... .......Excuses

The most powerful force in life........ ........... Love

The most dangerous act....... ..A gossip

The world's most incredible computer.... ....The brain T

he worst thing to be without..... ......... ..... Hope

The deadliest weapon...... ......... ........The tongue

The two most power-filled words....... ......... 'I Can'

The greatest asset........ ........... ......... .....Faith

The most worthless emotion.... .......... ....Self- pity

The most beautiful attire...... .......... ........SMILE!

The most prized possession.. ......... ......Integrity

The most powerful channel of communication. ...Prayer

The most contagious spirit...... ......... ......Enthusiasm

Life ends; when you stop Dreaming

Hope ends; when you stop Believing

Love ends; when you stop Caring

And Friendship ends; when you stop Sharing...!!!

The American Idol Fever

I watched the finale night of the too-sensationalized american idol! I love the performance of Kris Allen but the voice and the over-all package of ADAM LAMBERT was simply vibrant! Adam was a total performer (not to mention his really--really--gorgeous eyes!). I voted for Adam because of the intense gravity he exudes when he sings and his over-the top vocals really made him powerful on stage! Adam is today and tomorrows new SUPERSTAR! believe me--even if my friends told me that he's a gay--i dont care! He was simply great! His performance gave me chills, the way he took all the high notes was unbelievable! Honestly----I want more of Adam! I believe he will go far in the music industry! Go ADAM!

CISD at Hubo Island, Magallanes

Last Friday and Saturday rich, aisa and I went to magallanes sorsogon for CISD session with the children and teens of Barangay Hubo (an island) in Magallanes, Sorsogon. Sorsogon was the hardest hit province in Bicol by Typhoon "Dante." Nearly 20 residents died in the province during the typhoon's onslaught. In the island itself, 18 residents died after a massive landslide which caught the victims in surprise (it happened at around 4 AM). With Olive, Mitch and the other staff of Green Valley Development Foundation and World Vision, we traversed the sea for 45 minutes under the heat of the sun. After which, the hard work came---we reached out to around 74 children and teens through our Citical Incident Stress Debriefing Session and a PTSD Survey Interview. The work was hard--not withstanding the heat and the intense emotion among the people but our work has proven its worth--we went home relieved to know that out of the 74 survivors, we have identified only 11 for further intervention.In the aftermath of any critical incident, psychological reactions are quite common and are fairly predictable. Critical Incident Stress Debriefing (CISD) can be a valuable tool following a traumatic event.Debriefing is a specific technique designed to assist others in dealing with the physical or psychological symptoms that are generally associated with trauma exposure. Debriefing allows those involved with the incident to process the event and reflect on its impact.

In the afternoon, we left with the strong feeling that the survivors of Hubo Landslide will cope up---their stories of hope and their beautiful dreams for their family will help them conquer life again.

FiGhTiNg ThE bULLy BaTTle Part I

On Monday I will be starting with the 1st wave of my national seminar entitled: "FIGHT THE BULLY BATTLE: Workshop on Establishing Anti-Bullying Program in Schools". This session is a complete application of my book (i wrote about it in my previous entries!). I am excited and at the same time anxious! Like my other life-skills sessions, I preferred this seminar to have small number of participants to at least provide maximum venue for participation and interaction.

This interactive session will focus on Bullying---its nature and effect. Bullying in our schools should be taken very seriously. It is not a normal part of growing up and it can ruin lives. Bullying hurts and our vulnerable children need not to endure it. Being put-down, embarrassed, physically hurt or terrorized in school on a regular basis is hurtful for students at any grade or year level. Bullying can make a student feel unwanted and rejected. It is compulsory then for schools to have measures in place to encourage good behavior and respect for others and to prevent all forms of bullying.

Wish me luck!

Tidbits of Happiness!

Lately---i'm observing a bit of burnout symptoms in my workplace...getting out of work is probably one of the highlights of my day lately...maybe because I feel so loaded or maybe because I'm feeling a bit demoralized (which are purely because of human factors!)....believe me--I know that there is a way to find happiness at work—and I'm willing to look for it...again. Honestly, now--I am looking back and reflecting on what made me ultimately start working at my current job and why I love this job in the first place---at least to give me the much-needed perspective to my situation. I know that I have been achieving so much lately---but I am still asking myself--why am I feeling burnout lately?Visualizing my ideal job situation gives me an idea now of how far I need to go to reach that end result---that total job satisfaction! Like any other working psychologist---i am rsolved to thinking that the more I focus on what is wrong with my situation, the worse things actually seem. And that if I continue to focus on the bad things, these bad aspects will be the only thing I will see and feel, ultimately creating more negativity down the road....so again, I'm trying to jump again in the so called "love your job" bandwagon! Trying to be okay---trying to find little bits of happiness with my friends at work. Today--I'm a believer of the reality that there is always a way to make a bad situation better—and I'm wiling to look for it!