I had a very memorable session with a client I'd like to call "Ms. B" two days ago. Talking with Ms. B and exploring her little world was a complete out of the world experience! Initially, I knew Ms. B is not like my typical clients, not very well dressed, with very poor self-care skills and quiet different! After our brief self-introductions, Ms. B showed me a paper signed by a psychiatrist--Ms. B was diagnosed of suffering from psychosis. She came to me (voluntarily) when she learned about my center (CYWTAC).Despite of her personal awareness of her condition, she excitedly went to see me and told me (with all her manic excitement!) that she has high hope for recovery! What amazed me so much is Ms. B's awareness of how her condition interferes with her life's everyday demands. Although most of those suffering from psychosis suffers from extreme poor reality testing, Ms. B was the opposite. She told me how her condition is currently affecting her life specifically her relationships. Ms. B (in her bipolaric mood!) narrated to me her experiences of delusions, extreme hallucinations, her abnormal display of emotion, her always mistaken perception and unfounded fear (suspiciousness). She also scholastically told me about her neuroleptic and anti-psychotic medications, her never-ending series of tests (drug screen, MRI, etc..) and the infamous "electroshock" therapy she underwent in the states. Truly, I was amazed! I started to doubt if Ms. B was indeed a psychotic patient--instead of losing contact with her reality--Ms. B was totally connected.
Anyway, what puzzled me so much is Ms. B's attitude and outlook of her condition. Instead of finding a young woman who should be disorganized with her thoughts I met a young lady with so much hope and meaningful life lessons than a normal person.
Allow me to share some of the highlights of our meaningful conversation and see for yourself if we need to listen even to the mentally impaired to learn something about what we call LIFE!
-When asked about how she is coping with her mental disability, Ms. B innocently told me: "WHY BURDEN MYSELF WITH THE THOUGHT THAT I HAVE PSYCHOSIS?---THINKING ABOUT IT WILL JUST MAKE THINGS DIFFICULT FOR ME....I'M LIVING MY LIFE WITH PSYCHOSIS AND JUST FINDING WAYS TO ENJOY IT---INCLUDING THE HALLUCINATIONS AND DELUSIONS ALIKE!"
-When asked how she is coping with the stigma of mental disorder, Ms. B excitedly told me: "HONESTLY, I BELIEVE THAT ALL OF US HAVE OUR LITTLE DEGREE OF INSANITY --MINE IS JUST PRONOUNCED, HAS A NAME AND MINE IS WILLINGLY ACCEPTED!"
-When asked about her plans for the future, Ms. B wonderfully answered: "MY FUTURE IS NOW...WHAT I CAN DO NOW CAN MAKE OR BREAK ME--THAT'S MY FUTURE!"
After our talk, I cannot help but ask myself, how many of the supposed normal (!) people can actually think about the life lessons that Ms. B presented? How many of us can really retrospect on those profound thoughts? Most of us when afflicted by temporary pain (emotionally and physically), we tend to wonder what is left of our life after the pain?, or blame these temporary pains and hurts in ruining our lives?
I hope we normal people will have the same outlook in life as that of Ms. B. So positive and so accepting! I hope it will not take psychosis for us to learn the life lessons that Ms. B learned from her existence. In life, truly, there are no mistakes, only lessons!
