I was surprised to see a message from a long lost friend in my facebook account few days ago. It was from a friend who asked help on how she could cope up with the death of a boyfriend. As much as possible, I avoid topics like that because it brings me back to memory lane--but i cannot help but emphatize with her. Coping with death is actually the most difficult phase in all grieving processes--believe me--the process really takes time (so better be ready to cry and feel sad for a long time!)-- and the healing really happens gradually..as in slowly and painfully! The intensity of the grief depends on the preparedness and predictability of the person on the loss. Honestly, the grief at the onset of the process is much like a wave --the triggers of remembering the person comes on and off. truly, its a difficult phase.
But looking on the other side of the coin--we can always get through! thats the good news! Although coping can sometimes take time--what is important is we can get back to normal life---in due time. For some people, talking about the loneliness and the grief help enormously. Others would change their environment temporarily to symbolize a new start without the person. Some would re-focus on restoring friendships with long lost acquiances or others would ju
st simple focus on work. At first it may seem like impossible to recover--but grief does gradually get better and gets less intense in time. NO matter how you choose to grieve, there is no one right way to do it. The most important element is that you should take care of yourself--this is the best thing that you could do--for yourself, for your remaining loveones and for your family. Its important for surviving loveones not to drop out of life! If you feel that "moving on" is difficult then, "keeping on" might make the difference. Its always better to tell yourself that keeping on with life is what you can do for now--going forward doesnt mean forgetting the person you love. Enjoying life doesnt mean you no longer miss the person--you have to start feeling better because its the best measureof how you loved the person that you wanted to make your life even more meaningful even without him/her. With your friends, family and support group--I'm sure--we can always cope with our loss.
st simple focus on work. At first it may seem like impossible to recover--but grief does gradually get better and gets less intense in time. NO matter how you choose to grieve, there is no one right way to do it. The most important element is that you should take care of yourself--this is the best thing that you could do--for yourself, for your remaining loveones and for your family. Its important for surviving loveones not to drop out of life! If you feel that "moving on" is difficult then, "keeping on" might make the difference. Its always better to tell yourself that keeping on with life is what you can do for now--going forward doesnt mean forgetting the person you love. Enjoying life doesnt mean you no longer miss the person--you have to start feeling better because its the best measureof how you loved the person that you wanted to make your life even more meaningful even without him/her. With your friends, family and support group--I'm sure--we can always cope with our loss. Good Luck!
